I just looked through my training diary to find, this time last year I had just started back at caversham after being in rehab all summer. I was still in a mess and was still falling over sometimes and dealing with neural sensations that drove me mad. I am doing more now in one day than I was this time last year in a week.
I had just focused so hard on performance I kind of lost track of time, then when I looked back, I thought, wow I have come so far in such a short time. Thanks to everyone who has made this possible at Bisham and Caversham and all my friends and family
Well all was going great in Spain, then with 4 days left I started feeling not to great, sore heads and my back was getting sore.
What I experienced next scared me very much as it took me right back to what it was like in hospital after surgery. My body just shut down, I could not walk and I lost 5kg over night. It was a long night and I was in a fair bit of pain. I felt pretty lost and the next few weeks provided me with a mental challenge that I had not yet experienced since surgery. For the first time, I think it really sank in what I had been through.
In all this time I have buried my head and just driven for goals and dreams, but this was different, my mind was somewhere else. I felt pretty lost and pretty low.
This is understandable after how much my life had changed in 16 months. The question now, was how do I get back into my positive mind set?
This is where good mates come in! I spent some time chatting with a few close friends on the phone and over some green tea, and it sorted my mind out right away, it is so important to talk about stuff like this with people who understand you and to have a good laugh. Cheers Ben and Euan :)
I also spent some time chatting with people who had been through similar surgeries, and it is always nice to know your not alone.
Of course it is not going to be easy, hurdles are put there for us to jump over, walls for us to ran through, this is life!
Wither your coming back from injury or just going through a hard time, remember how important your friends and family are and don't take them for granted.
However no one can do it for you. You have to do it!!! Sometimes you have to look deep into yourself and push your mind harder than you thought you could, and this is the mind set you need to find!
Check out these clips - two of my real inspirations in life and two great athletes. Herschel Walker was one of the NFL greats and made UFC debut at 48 years old. He has over come lots to be one of the greatest athletes ever. Herman Maier the Austrian skier who motivated me for as long as I can remember and truly a machine that could not be broken physically or mentally.